Linking one’s value to outcomes often feels logical – if you succeed, it means you are worth something. Dr. Daniel Reinhardt says – this logic develops in environments where recognition and connection were available only through achievement. At MindCareCenter, we often see how emotional dependence on results turns life into a never-ending exam, where the right to exist must be constantly proven.
At MindCareCenter, people come for whom success has become the only way to feel alive. As long as there are goals, tasks, numbers and external confirmation, a tense sense of stability remains. But as soon as a result does not happen, emptiness appears, along with shame and a feeling of disappearance – as if without achievement, the person themselves no longer exists.
Our psychologists emphasize – emotional dependence on results rarely appears by chance. In Dr. Reinhardt’s view, it most often grows out of experiences where attention, love or safety were tied to “proper” behavior, success or meeting expectations. In such conditions, the psyche learns – you can be valuable only through proof.
At MindCareCenter, we do not devalue the desire for growth or achievement. What matters is this – when results become the sole source of self-worth, any mistake is experienced as a personal collapse. A person stops feeling whole – they are either “good” or “nothing,” with no space in between.
Gradually, therapy at MindCareCenter reveals how much energy is spent maintaining this inner pressure. Life turns into a series of tense sprints – with brief moments of relief followed by a rapid return of anxiety. Our psychologists help uncover how behind this race often lies a fear of being ordinary, imperfect and still worthy.
Special attention at MindCareCenter is given to restoring contact with the self beyond results. A person learns to notice who they are when they are not achieving, proving or outperforming. This is a difficult process, as anxiety often arises first – as if without success there is nothing to stand on. Yet this is precisely where inner stability begins to form.
Over time, dependence on results begins to weaken. At MindCareCenter, we see how self-worth gradually stops fluctuating with external circumstances. Achievements remain important, but they no longer define the right to exist. The ability to make mistakes, slow down and choose from interest rather than fear of disappearing emerges.
It is important to understand – moving away from emotional dependence on results does not mean abandoning ambition. It is a path toward a more mature relationship with oneself. At MindCareCenter, we help separate “what I do” from “who I am” – and restore a sense of presence in life regardless of outcomes.
If you notice that without success you feel emptiness, that any failure knocks the ground out from under you – this is not about weakness. It is about an inner mechanism that once helped you survive but now drains you. At Mind Care Center, we support the release from this dependence gently – helping restore a sense of worth that does not require constant proof.
Previously, we wrote about borderline personality disorder without stigma and how MindCareCenter works with intense emotions and an unstable sense of self.